Unfortunately - or fortunately, depending on your outlook - you cannot do this, you have to rely on the architect telling you, or you actually checking.
You could 'bind' the Architectural file, which would turn the architecture into a 'group' - not ideal, as Architects files can be large.
One thing you could do, is ask the Architect to supply their ceilings as a group (which is really a Revit project file), and to maintain that group in their project.
Each time they issue you their model, you get an updated 'ceiling group.rvt' which could override the ceiling group in your project. A bit of management, you would need to turn off linked ceilings, but thats a cleanup method similar to that described in my blog...
http://bim-bs.blogspot.com/2008/12/linked-file-cleanup.html
Also talk to the architect and ask them not to delete things that already exist - CHANGE is good, Revit is the Change engine
Simon